Home » Uncategorized » I know what you’re searching for….

I know what you’re searching for….

There are three topics that bring people to my blog time and time again. In order of popularity, they are;

  1. How to pass a drug test
  2. How to use the darknet (ironic, because half the reason you’d need to pass a drug test would be because of shit you bought off the darknet)
  3. When’s the 2016 Suzuki Hayabusa coming out?

Many of the people searching these terms had questions which my articles failed to address. In the interest of being thorough, I will address these questions now.

How much bleach do I need to pass for meth on a drug test?

Um, you’re fucking kidding, right? Are you asking about drinking bleach or pouring it into your urine? Drinking the bleach will definitely make it so you don’t have to take the drug test – on account of you’ll be dead. Pouring bleach directly into your urine sample will likely result in you being pulled for a higher caliber test, when it’s shown that your urine has more chlorine than the average swimming pool. Meth will stay in your system for three to five days, so just put the damn pipe down for a week and you’ll be cool. Don’t drink bleach and don’t put it in your pee.

Will meth help me pass a drug test for weed?

No, meth won’t help you pass a drug test. I cannot comprehend the idiocy which gave birth to that particular line of logic. Smoking meth to pass a drug test would be a bit like eating pancakes to cure diabetes. The only thing that will happen if you smoke meth to get weed out of your system is you’ll test positive for both and wind up in court-ordered rehab. I’m assuming that this idea comes from the fact that amphetamines speed metabolism, which could actually be counterintuitive. Marijuana has an oil base, which makes it attach to other oils like human fat. Speeding up your metabolism is more likely to release old metabolites than it is to get rid of new ones.

Time and water, those are your options. That’s it. Time and water. There is no magic cure. If there was, no one would ever fail a drug test and probation would be obsolete.

How do I buy meth on the darknet?

What is it with you people and meth? Look, the darknet is crazy expensive for everything but weed. Weed’s cheap because of legal competition. Meth, not so much. If you’re hard up, yes you can buy it there but it’s going to cost you a fuckton and to be honest, I’ve never met a rich meth addict. Check out the Darknet subreddit to get specific info regarding PGP, Bitcoin and black markets. Just note there’s a learning curve and if you’re one of those who can barely send an attachment via email, you’re not going to be able to do it.

When does the new Suzuki Hayabusa come out?

I have no fucking clue. I wrote the article a long time ago, for some scammer who never paid me, and slapped it up on my site so they couldn’t use it. The only info I can give you about any scooter is something my dad said a long time ago.

“Scooters are like fat chicks. They’re fun to ride till your friends see you on one.”

That’s all I got. Hope I clarified a few things, because I learned a few things myself. Those things are;

  • A lot of meth users come to my site.
  • The vast majority of those meth users are idiots who I should be encouraging to drink bleach
  • The Suzuki Hayabusa is the preferred mode of transportation for meth heads everywhere.



4 thoughts on “I know what you’re searching for….

  1. On the positive side, meth helped cure my crack addiction. In my area, crack started to be cut with meth. I couldnt get high anymore but instead of crashing after a half hour, i was up all fucking night. After a while, i just stopped buying. It was no fun anymore. Just exhausting. I move away and am now a productive human being with a bit of an alcohol problem. Thats ok. Not up for 24 hours in a row anymore.

    • I only did meth once, a strain called glass which was supposed to be the most ‘pure’ form of the drug. For about 5 minutes, it was awesome. It felt good just to breathe! I got why people got addicted to it….
      Then, I projectile vomited on everything. And by everything, I mean like all the things. There was nothing in that drug dealer’s house that wasn’t covered in vomit.

      Turns out, I’m allergic to opiates and desoxyn, which makes it pretty much impossible to take anything scheduled in pill form. While it’s annoying when I have to suffer through pain after a surgery or something, I have to admit it’s kind of a mixed blessing. While I have the potential to be an addict, there is no way I’d get addicted to something that would make me puke. But for the allergy, I’d probably be giving hand jobs for meth by now. 😉

      That probably makes me less sympathetic to amphetamine addicts than I should be. It’s easy to say no to something when you have no desire to do it.

      Despite that, it should probably be noted that I get addiction wicked sucks, especially for something as all-encompassing as meth, and I dig the fact that you were able to get past it…because of the very thing that most people like about it in the first place. 🙂 That’s what I call irony.

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