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The Rorschach Guess

Today is Hermann Rorschach’s 129th birthday. Yeah, I think it’s stupid to keep celebrating birthdays after someone is dead too, but it makes good blog fodder.

Anyway, in honor of this momentous occasion, I’ve decided to psychoanalyze myself using some of Rorschach’s common patterns.


In this pattern, I see that slave girl Oola from Star Wars – Return of the Jedi, starring in an orgy porno with a disembodied ejaculating penis with arms, while the spaceship from space invaders looks on.

Analysis – My brain is filthy…and stuck in 1987


This is clearly Bigfoot getting a pap smear.

Analysis – Weirdly, I always thought Bigfoot was a boy. Guess I’m sexist.

Rorschach 3

Cockroach dance party between two penis towers.

Analysis – Anyone else think it’s weird that I’ve seen genitals in every single picture?  This Rorschach guy was a fucking perv! Seriously, he was worse than those dudes at Disney.


This isn’t a Rorschach test. This is what happens whenever I photocopy my ass.

Analysis – I have a demon living in my anus.

Based on my own analysis, I have this to say. Psychoanalysis in 1921 was apparently nothing but guesswork in a lab coat. Simply stated, I don’t have a lot of faith in a doctor who can’t even diagnose his own appendix rupture.

Happy birthday anyway, Hermann Rorschach. Thanks for the entertainment.

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